Overall, the rough draft of Ryan's essay looks well done. He has a great deal of sources and information and manages to take a stance on a rather unpopular topic and defend it expertly. I will, however, make a content suggestion:
- You certainly match the requirements put forth by the Project 3 guidelines. You brought up what you claim is a great idea and explain why it is so great.
- Some minor grammatical fixes should be done (E.g. capitalize MSNBC fully).
- Don't forget to take into account counter arguments to your piece. For example, your section talking about whether illegal immigration is a problem or not, one rebuttal could be that illegal immigration has slowed and that we are deporting more aliens than are coming in successfully.
- You did use information from Trump's own website; a great deal of bias could be present. However, I believe that in the context that it was being used in, you did well.
- Overall, you used a great deal of sources in your piece. Make sure there's a comprehensive Works Cited!
No comments:
Post a Comment